https://beverleyknights.co.uk/rides/7010/

“Right men, today is going to be another ‘local derby’. This time the ‘match’ will be against our eastern neighbours ‘The Spotted Ducks’ at Fitling.” outlined ‘coach’ Raymond before adding “but we’ll take a different tack for this game”. After outlining our ‘tactics’ the ‘team’ set off.

The initial ‘phase of the game’ saw a lot of ‘duckin and divin’ as we made our way through the myriad of defences in the form of cars, traffic lights etc until reaching Weel Bridge. The ‘team’ then began to settle into their task maintaining a nice steady rhythm as we continued on to Tickton and Routh.

On the next ‘phase’ through Meaux, the pace picked up with the five strong “attack force” surging forward desperately seeking the first ‘goal’. On reaching the junction of Swine Road there was no let up in the pace as the ‘team’ sailed on towards Swine aided by a generally helpful wind. It felt like no time at all when we reached Coniston. “Shouldn’t we wait for the ‘midfield’ and ‘defence’ to catch up?” enquired one of the ‘attack force’. However, sensing ‘victory’ not far away they decided to keep ‘pressing forward’ to Sproatley.

Another burst of pace from Mark our ‘No.9’ for the ‘first half’ had Barry all flustered. “I only came out for a gentle ride” he said before racing onto the front as we approached Humbleton. As then Mark continued to set the pace, it later became apparent there may have been an ulterior motive. No… not to be first in the queue but as he explained later “I don’t eat breakfast if I’m only doing 50 miles”. No wonder he was in such a hurry for the ‘half time whistle’. I’m sure he could have eaten the whole duck not just a spot of it!

For the ‘second half’ the team mixed things up a bit with some of the ‘attackers’ dropping back to ‘midfield’ or ‘defence’ while others looking for ‘promotion’ spread their wings and headed up to the front. The new formation battled their way into the head wind as we passed Burton Constable and onwards to Old Ellerby.

By the time we’d reached Skirlaugh there was no sign of the “attack” force. Leading the “rear guard”, Matty side swerved the Skirlaugh defence leading us onto Cawood Drive before returning to Beningholme Lane. Still no sign of the attackers left us wondering if they were ahead of us or waiting at the end of Beningholme Lane. Fortunately the attackers had spotted the ruse and were able to bring the team together once more.

By this time the wind had “parked the bus” in front of the “goal” making progress difficult. Things were not helped when Pugwash began to feel a little “deflated” and realised his rear tyre had gone flat. Luckily the “stretcher” was not needed but with lots of teamwork and great assistance from team doctor Neil, we were soon back on the road once more. Buoyed by the brief interlude, the team set off along the Meaux Road to return to Routh. This time with the wind briefly at our backs, Matty raced to the front and hit a “screamer” in an effort to find the ‘opening goal’.

The “opposition” however was not giving up easily and as we turned back towards Beverley the “holding role” of the wind made progress difficult. When the “final whistle” blew, the crowds began heading for the exits to make their way home reflecting on what had been a “beautiful game” regardless of the “teams” having drawn a “duck”.

🎶How many roads must a Knight ride down, before they call him a fan?🎶 No amount of wind blowin was about to spoil our day out with fifteen Knights turning out for a flattish ride to Allerthorpe. Well at least that was the plan until our maestro route master gave an option of “long and flat” or “short and hilly”. “Short and hilly to the Fiddle Drill it is then. How about this route?” asked Raymond as he outlined the “new” route. 🎶How many times must a man repeat himself, before the message sinks in?🎶 After the third time of singing the same song we’d finally “got it”.

Just as we were about to set off, Michael appeared in the distance along the road. He’s obviously trying to earn himself the title of lastminute.com. As he got closer, shouts went out “Keep Going! Don’t stop!” Unfortunately for him he’d missed the “briefing” and started to set off in the wrong direction. Luckily for him, we were feeling in good spirits and shouted to advise him of his error.

Splitting into two groups, the first leg of our journey headed directly into the wind with a steady incline towards Newbald making it feel like cycling through treacle. The genius of our route master soon became apparent when we turned onto Stoneknowle hill with the wind now behind giving a little gentle push to help us on the way. The climbing however continued until eventually reaching High Gardham before a long descent towards Etton.

Next on the agenda was the climb up to Holme-on-the-Wolds with the wind blowin’ on the side. The full brunt of the wind was somewhat tempered by the hedgerows just watch out for the “broadside” when passing the gaps. Turning west on the Middleton road it was time for head winds once more. This however was only a “taster” of what was to come. Our route master had thrown in a “curve ball” opting to turn back towards Kiplingcotes. Now we were facing the full force of the wind directly ahead. Fortunately the initial climb was a short sharp ramp before dropping down to Kiplingcotes.

The final section to the cafe took us onto more familiar territory along the gravel strewn Spring Road before heading upwards on this year’s hill climb challenge to reach the Fiddle Drill.

On leaving the cafe, we headed back uphill along Cross Gate to the junction to Kiplingcotes. Turning onto the downhill we were fully exposed to a strong cross wind which made for a rather dodgy descent. It was like being shoulder jostled in an invisible peloton until we reached the shelter of the hedgerows further down. In a further route variation we then did a zig-zag to pass through Dalton Park Estate.

On reaching South Dalton it was back to our usual return route through Etton and Cherry Burton. It had been a superb roller coaster of a ride enjoyed by all despite the strong wind. 🎶How many hills can the knights climb, before they reach the sky? The answer my friend, is blowin in the wind 🎶

Eleven witches🧙‍♀️ and wizards🧙‍♂️ gathered at Market Cross for this Sunday’s ride to Hutton Cranswick Farm Shop. “Double double, toil and trouble….” and that’s just the route. “Is Grovehill Road open?” asked one wizard. Looking around at the sea of puzzled faces nobody knew definitively so Pugwash offered up an alternative way to reach Weel Bridge. Then at the “witching hour” we mounted our “broomsticks” and set off. “Follow Puggy” cried head wizard.

On passing the end of Grovehill Road there were no signs of closure but we kept going on the alternative mystery tour. Eventually we arrived at the “magic roundabout”. “Now I know where we are!” cried out one wizard. Progress to Tickton was fairly swift aided by a following wind.

Just as we approached the road crossing at Tickton, we caught up with “Gandalf” plodding slowly along the cycle path. Due to the amount of traffic we didn’t all manage to cross together. 🎶”Should I stay or should I go” 🎶 If we wait we’ll have pass “Gandalf” again, thought Mark as he continued along the cycle path pursued by Pugwash. “We can wait at Whitecross roundabout to regroup”.

The “coven” then continued through Leven and Brandesburton taking ‘spells’ on the front eventually taking the road to Dunnington. The pace remained quick until reaching Skipsea Brough where we then turned westwards and our first taste of headwinds through to Beeford. Turning off towards Foston-on-the-Wolds we had a brief respite from the wind.

When we reached the Frodingham Road the “coven” stopped to regroup, all except Mark who suddenly shot off towards Brigham. “Where’s he going?” we all asked. “Has he gone the wrong way?” “Perhaps he’s going to try the Brigham sprint”. It soon became clear as he rested his “broom” against a nearby tree. Meanwhile, Head Wizard suggested phoning the cafe when we reach Wansford and began a head count. “Why don’t you phone now?” suggested Head Witch followed by a chorus of “Yes Neil, why don’t you phone now? The Head Witch has spoken”. The “incantations” however fell on deaf ears as he shot off up the road.

After another brief pit stop at Wansford Bridge it was now full on into the wind as we continued to Skerne and Hutton Cranswick. “Did he call the cafe?” someone asked. Turns out four of the “coven” were not stopping.

After refuelling at the Farm Shop, the remaining seven set of to battle into the wind heading towards Bracken farm. Just as we reached Bracken top, there was a loud pop. “Oh oh, curses, PUNCTURE!” cried Mark. In effecting the repair he was ably assisted by Matthew and we were soon on our way again. However less than a mile further down the road once again “BANG phssst” was heard. “Double curses” wailed Mark as he pulled up to inspect the damage. “Looks like that hole in your tyre is the cause” we all suggested before adding “You’ll need a new tyre now but here’s a tyre patch to get you home”. “What!” cried Mark “I’m a Yorkshireman, there’s another 1000 miles in that tyre”.

Once on our way again, we continued battling into the wind as we followed our usual route home through Holme-on-the-Wolds to Etton and Cherry Burton.

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The seeds of dissent were sewn on an earlier voyage when Matt the Hootle proposed a journey beginning at Market Cross heading to Millington. “The cafe is not open on Tuesday” advised Greybeard at which point the Admiral piped on board with an alternative route. “Wah!” wailed Greybeard “I don’t want to meet at Market Cross. I don’t like that road” throwing his cutlass to the floor in a mock fit of pique. In an effort to reestablish his authority Matt then rejigged the route for Allerthorpe.

Fast forward to Friday and it was Greybeard’s turn to propose a route to the Farm Shop meeting at Manor House at 0945. It has been said that revenge is best served with a cold custard pie in the face, so no sooner had the rallying call gone out than Matt the Hootle lobbed his pie. “Wah!” he wailed mockingly “I don’t like that road. Can we meet at Market Cross 0930?”. Unfortunately not everyone saw the funny side as Michael Fastender suggested going to both places, then the Admiral began questioning the sanity of “Mr Grumpy”.

Twelve Knights “climbed aboard” the “Friday Rider” at Manor House. While waiting for the appointed hour to “set sail”, the Admiral started handing out our new club socks. ✴️Pow✳️sock✴️pow✳️sock✴️ a bit like a superhero cartoon strip though not to be mistaken for the verbal fisticuffs from earlier.

“OK folks, the tide is right, let’s set sail” cried Greybeard reinforcing his authority as ‘head of the table’ aboard the “Friday Rider”. The sun beamed down as we travelled out towards Cherry Burton and Etton. With light winds it was quite pleasant to be out. Our first challenge soon arrived as Greybeard sent us all up the “crows nest” aka Kiplingcotes Race Course “just to avoid the gravelly Spring Road”. On reaching the top, we turned towards Goodmanham and Market Weighton.

Our next challenge came soon after as we made our way up Intake Hill then past Londesborough towards Nunburnholme top. Climbing for a little over two miles with gentle gradients including some ramps up to 7% soon saw the fleet strung out.

After regrouping we continued our passage towards Warter top. Along the way, the good ship Jenny sprung a leak and needed repairing. Luckily there were enough “hands on deck” to assist and we were soon on our way once more. On reaching the bottom of the hill, shouts of “GRAVEL” rang out followed by the crunching of gears as we exited onto a short uphill ramp as we turned towards the east. This was followed by a lovely long downhill blast along Dalton Dale into North Dalton.

The final leg to the “bunker” station continued along the main road then through Bainton and Southburn before reaching the port of Hutton Cranswick. The fleet then “anchored” around the back of the local chandlery (aka Farm Shop) to take on board various supplies. Many were tempted by the scrumpy… I mean scrummy cakes on offer. Sensible as ever though, the vice Admiral ordered poached eggs on toast. “Sorry we’re not serving breakfast now no poached eggs” she was told, before opting for an sandwich alternative. A little later as the victuals began to arrive at the table, the “chandler” called out “Who ordered the beans on toast with poached egg on top?” I’m not sure if that was annoyance or a flummoxed look that appeared on the face of the vice admiral as she decided to keep schtum pulling an imaginary zip across her lips. Next time she’ll have to order the beans with egg on top, just “hold” the beans.

On the journey home we were slightly hampered heading into the south-south-westerly wind following our usual route over Bracken then across to South Dalton before retracing our way through Etton and Cherry Burton to end another crackin’ roller-coaster ride.

Unless you’re the sensible type and have a protein filled alternative. The recipe for today’s bake included a handful of hills, a sprinkling of flats interspersed with a soupçon of villages and quiet roads. Eight contestants gathered at Market Cross for the Big Beverley Bike Off to show off their cycling skills. “Right everyone, you all have the ingredients” announced Pugwash “It’s 0930 get your oven on and ready… BIKE!”

The contestants set off on step one, following the Molescroft road outwards to Cherry Burton. Next up was the familiar Etton Mess. It seems not everyone had fully read the recipe instructions as Barry’s hand reached out to turn towards South Dalton before shouts from behind set him on the correct path. By the time we reached lower Gardham, the heat in the kitchen was beginning to rise steadily along with the gradient.

When we reached the highest point of Stoneknowle hill we were joined by Zog just in time for him to about turn and return downhill. Swooping downwards towards North Newbald the pedals started spinning like a mixer on high speed. Continuing with the next step of recipe we covered a few more ‘peaks and troughs’ until arriving at Hotham. “You know I’ve read the recipe but I still don’t know where we’re going” said Matty as we turned towards North Cave. ‘Dough’, who said anyone can follow a recipe?

A final frantic dash along the busy main road towards Gilberdyke and then it was ‘relax’ as we turned towards the much quieter road to Broomfleet. This ‘proved’ to be as flat as a pancake and with the wind behind us and the sun on our backs, progress was quite swift, reaching Ellerker in good time.

“A table for nine please” enquired the contestants at the Olive Tree cafe in Ellerker Garden centre. Luckily they were able to accommodate us on a table with a reserved sign. After a brief review of the menu, almost everyone gathered around the cake counter like excited kids in a sweet shop to survey the ‘scrumptious’ offerings to be found there.

It was then time for the contestants to show off the results of their choices. First up was Barry with a Cherry scone which was equivalent in size to a house brick. “Wow, that’ll weigh you down on the way home!” Next up was the Date Slice and fruit scone but the showstopper was surely the chocolate orange cheesecake which had everyone drooling in their coffee.

A little later, gathering outside in the lovely warm sunshine, it was time reveal who will be leaving the contest. “The person leaving the contest today is 🎶🥁🥁🎶….. Zog”. Well he does live nearby and had already cycled 10-15 miles to meet us.

The remainder of the contestants then set off to Elloughton led by Barry who’d found a new lease of life powered by that Cherry scone. On reaching ‘base camp’ at Brantingham, he decided to ‘peel’ off and make his own way home. The magnificent seven carried on while singing 🎶The only way is up 🎶. From the top of Elloughton Dale we eventually reached Riplingham.

It was at this point the “recipe book” was thrown to one side as first Matt decided to add a few more miles then Colin ‘chipped’ in with “We could do the sprint”. While Sharrin and Steve G took to the Westoby lane, the rest of us headed downhill to Raywell and on to Skidby before going our separate ways home. A warmly fought contest in which all were “star bikers” and not a ‘soggy bottom’ in sight.

For those who were able to stay over we had planned a shorter ride for the Sunday. The start point was at Ribblehead. Nobody fancied riding to the start and as we drove upwards from Hawes it was probably a wise decision.

The day started cloudy and rather cooler than we’ve been used to but the forecast was for increasing temperature. Setting off from our parking spot we cruised downhill then up a short ramp passing the Ribblehead Station. On reaching the top, Neil pulled over. “What’s up? You OK?” we asked thinking perhaps he’d suffered an early mechanical as it was too soon for a rest. Turns out he wanted a photo of the viaduct and regale us with the magnificence of Victorian engineering.

Back in the saddle we followed Low Sleights road to Chapel-le-Dale where we left the main road to pick up a tarmac’d farm track. It was like having our very own cycle path undulating along the valley of the river Doe. Well it was until we came face to face with a massive camper van sprawled across the width of the road. While the van stopped, we gingerly picked our way around it on the grass verge. We soon realised why he was on “our” road when we passed the entrance to a campsite.

As we rolled into Ingleton the Garmin indicated a left turn after crossing the bridge. Looking up at the houses to the left, they looked much higher up than our current position. Better get in the small ring methinks. A wise decision as we faced a really steep ramp hitting 20% at one point. Not everyone had the forethought with gear selection as Colin found himself still in the big ring straining every sinew just to keep the pedals turning. Fortunately his “pain” did not last too long.

The climbing continued for a mile or so after leaving Ingleton as we took the Old Road towards Clapham however that was followed by a superb winding undulating downhill run into Clapham. “That was fun” was the general consensus as we regrouped at the corner of Eggshell Lane. Heather then went off in search of her paramour (Alan Bennett) or at least that’s what everyone said, before rejoining us at the Old Sawmill Cafe.

Following a lovely lunch we saddled up again to continue south east along the Old Road. As we reached the A65 we took to the Strade Bianchi (gravel track cycle path) leading us onto the road to Austwick. This was the nadir of our route, so the only way from here was up. The next climb came soon enough as we headed towards Wharfe. The terrain continued undulating upwards towards Helwith Bridge as the group began spread out. After crossing the Ribble we turned northwards following the route of the river towards Horton-in-Ribblesdale before returning to the car park near Ribblehead.

While some of us began to load the bikes onto our cars, four of our group Mark, Matty, Brian and Colin decided to extend their ride by cycling back to Hilltop Farm. After another initial climb from Ribblehead the “four horsemen” then enjoyed a superb downhill for around 10km into Hawes.