And The Winner Is….

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The “runners and riders” gathered at the start in Etton ready for Raymond’s extravaganza of hills and thrills. After our “host” outlined the days proceedings the “show” got underway.

The “opening act” of the day saw the Knights climbing up on the stage to Holme-on-the-Wolds with a gentle breeze and a watery sun at our backs. After gathering at the top, the “entertainment” continued with a gentle “rendition” leading the troupe to Middleton-on-the-Wolds. With the “warm up acts” completed we were ready for the next climb to North Dalton where the troupe split in two groups.

The larger group continued upwards to Huggate while a smaller breakaway headed for Bainton. While the breakaway battled into the wind the main group continued to gently climb. Heather set off as pace maker with everyone else happy to wallow in “the accolades” behind her until nearing the top when Matty decided to push on a bit quicker leaving the rest to decide if they should follow or not. On reaching the top, we stopped briefly to bask in the warm sun and reflect on our pleasant ride so far.

After the short “interval” we headed towards Tibthorpe and then realised our easy climb had been wind assisted. The next “act” was a bit like “dueling banjos” as Puggy and Matty vied for the “limelight” cutting their way through the wind at the front. “Well that was hard work” we all agreed. However our work was not yet done as we continued to Kirkburn.

There was some confusion as we reached the first “turn” to Southburn. Some carried on regardless to the next junction ignoring the advice that the road was closed. Some people just love to find a way through closed roads! 😂 Luckily on this occasion it was accessible for cyclists. There were some sighs of relief when we reached Hutton Cranswick and found some protection from the wind, then finally the moment we’d all been waiting for…. the winner of the Beverley Knights Cafe 2024 is…..Hutton Cranswick Farm Shop!

When it came time to return home Raymond asked which way we should go home. The wind direction became the deciding factor as we’d have the wind behind on the way to Bracken. Later when the “troupe” were approaching the pond on Mere Lane there was a shout from behind “Car Back!” After singling out Neil waved the vehicle through. However what we didn’t expect was a large truck pulling a trailer loaded with portaloos almost squeezing us off the road in the process. We had such a fright (at least I did) that those portaloos would have come in handy! Still, it did nothing to dampen the enjoyment of what was a wonderful day out and well attended.

A Tale of Two Rides

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“It was the best of rides, it was the worst of rides…” Which one were you on? I suppose it depends on whether you’re in for the “long haul” or a “Hedge Fun” manager. The “long haulers” met up at “a different time and a different place” with the intention of meeting up at the cafe. Meanwhile the “Hedge Funders” congregated at Tickton Grange to celebrate the return of Ray (“Dalio”) from his “winter training camp” 🕶🍹🍻⛱️.

Ten Knights “invested” in the “shorting” following the usual route out to Leven and Brandesburton before taking the “standard deviation” via Dunnington to Skipsea Brough. After continuing through Beeford the “investors” found themselves with some “directional exposure” as there was a certain amount of “liquidity” reported on the road to Foston-on-the-Wolds. Shortly after clearing the mud strewn section, Neil suffered a “run on his fund” causing his tyre to deflate.

Repairs complete, the “investors” continued through Wansford and Skerne before pitching up at Hutton Cranswick Farm Shop. While the group were enjoying the “fruits of their investments” the five “long haulers” turned up dripping in sweat and looking exhausted having completed a hilly 40 miles. “Where have you been then?” enquired someone cheekily.

When it was time for the “investors” to leave, we left the “long haulers” to finish refuelling. While returning along Burnbutts Lane we encountered a ROAD CLOSED sign. “Now where do we go?” As we discussed options, Heather set off to see if there was a way through. Full of enthusiasm, she returned with the news that yes there was a way past the road block but “we’d have to go around the farm house“. Merrily we followed along behind her, however as we approached the road block expecting to find a farmyard or similar it was with dogged determination that Heather “ploughed” on through the farmer’s field while the rest followed like 🐑 🐏 🐑. As if that wasn’t bad enough we were suddenly confronted by a prickly hedge blocking the way.

Now we know what it is like to be be dragged through a hedge! “Who’s idea was this anyway?” was the general consensus not looking at anyone in particular. I’m not sure this sort of off-roading was included in the risk assessment. (At least the “long haulers” saw sense and took the alternative route.) Once safely back on the road we carried on with the ride returning home on our usual route via Bracken, South Dalton and Etton. The temperature had become quite pleasant with the sun making a bid for freedom through the clouds creating perfect cycling conditions and despite the “hedging”, the ride was most enjoyable and gave us all something to remember.

A Beast from the East

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Seven Knights turned out for Raymond’s Friday ride. “Weather’s looking good for a ride” he stated confidently in an effort to rouse up some company. When the morning dawned, we were greeted with a dull grey blanket covering the sky and a breeze from the east. After meeting up in Etton we set off towards Holme-on-the-Wolds. As we continued west with the wind on our backs we noted a number of farm vehicles along the road. The peaceful start to the journey was then suddenly interrupted with a series of very loud gun shots, BANG BANG BANG. Made us almost jump out of our skin. Glad I’m not a rabbit or hare or whatever they were shooting at or perhaps they were testing a bird scarer.

Shortly after, we noted the wind beginning to pick up indicated by a solitary windmill in the distance whirling away like a turbo-prop ready for take off. Meanwhile we were confronted by a large lorry filling the road space forcing us to pull over into a nearby passing place and an opportunity for Ray to check his bike.

The next leg from Middleton-on-the-Wolds to North Dalton is a rollercoaster road and was not made any easier with the wind coming from the side.

At North Dalton no-one fancied the longer route via Huggate so we turned towards Bainton. Then, it was like someone had opened a fridge door and ramped the fan up to full blast, so it was with some relief when we turned off the main road into Bainton and found some shelter, albeit briefly, among the housing. Leaving Bainton we had a mad dash to Hutton Cranswick where we stopped for refreshments at the Farm Shop.

Around the table the banter flew and none more so than when there was a misunderstanding regarding Led Zeppelin and a hydrogen balloon leaving a smile on our faces as we headed back into the cold. Unusually on this occasion for the first part of the return trip over Burnbutts Lane we had the wind behind. Just as we were heading along Bracken Lane the sun put in a brief appearance, peeking out from the grey clouds like a nosy neighbour through the curtains. The rest of the ride became a matter of survival as we returned home having covered around 40 miles with only the warmth of the company to help us along.

Friday The 13th

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There was no sign of paraskevidekatriaphobia (fear of Friday 13th) this morning as 11 Knights turned up at Market Cross for a 50 mile ride with a cafe stop at Hutton Cranswick Farm Shop.

In fact there was more superstition surrounding Michael’s proclamation that he was riding his new bike which our recently departed friend Iain assured him had never suffered a puncture. Given Michael’s recent history in that department it was brave of him to “tempt fate”. Cue multiple mock expressions of disbelief along with promises to carry extra spare inner tubes.

No sooner had the ride set off when we ground to a halt at the railway crossing where we had a “double whammy” of trains passing before continuing our way towards Weel bridge and onwards to Tickton. Picking up the cycle path to Whitecross roundabout the ride meandered through Leven and Brandesburton before reaching the Bewholme road. Turning off on to the road to Dunnington we headed to Skipsea Brough. Along the way though, we got into a “dog fight” when a little “ankle biter” Jack Russel appeared on the road and made aggressive moves towards Pug. Fortunately his bark was worse than his bite and no harm was done (touch wood).

As we regrouped at Skipsea Brough someone suggested that the Wansford bridge was so closed but with a bit of luck (fingers crossed) we may find a way across. Up to that point we had enjoyed the light airs on our backs and the sun in our faces however once we started to head towards Beeford, the “light air” felt more like a breeze. After Beeford, the ride turned towards Foston-on-the-Wolds and on to Wansford where we found the bridge was definitely still closed. “Oh balderdash” cried our route master (or words to that effect). “Sorry men, we’ll have to head up to Driffield and back to Skerne”.

Splitting into two chain gangs we set off on our extended journey. Entering Driffield we were once again held up by a passing train. As we waited at the back of the queue, Dave 💧 🏠 shot off to the front. “He’s gone to ‘conduct’ the train out of the way” suggested one wag. The final leg of the outward journey took us through Skerne to Hutton Cranswick. Eight Knights stopped at the Farm Shop cafe while the other three continued home.

The homeward journey saw us taking our usual route over Bracken to South Dalton (except for Colin who headed to North Dalton) and Etton and Cherry Burton to complete another very enjoyable ride in great company.

Over The Bridge

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“Meet at Etton 10am” declared our illustrious leader. “Route out of Etton, turn right to South Dalton, over the bridge and turn left…”. At this point we were all confused. “Bridge? What bridge?”

The “mystery” must have intrigued many of us with 15 Knights turning up at the start point. “Where’s this bridge then Neil?” we asked waiting patiently for the explanation. A few minutes later, still none the wiser, we set off towards South Dalton. As we came to the bottom of the hill on the approach to South Dalton where the road crosses Beck’s Drain, “There it is!” cried Neil triumphantly. Underwhelmed would probably describe all of our reactions as someone shouted out “Call that a bridge?!”

With the “mystery” cleared, we turned left towards Kiplingcotes passing Dalton Park before turning onto the Kiplingcotes Race Course road and the climb up to Cross Gate. Somewhere along the climb, Jim noticed his bike computer had fallen off and turned back to look for it. It was not until we reached North Dalton that we realised Jim and Colin were still not with us. “They’ve gone back to look for Jim’s computer” somebody informed us.

After waiting a few minutes, Neil started looking at his watch. “We can’t wait too long. We don’t want to miss the poached eggs” he claimed before continuing on to Bainton then adding “Anyway they know where we’re going”. At the same time Michael decided to go on a wild goose chase and headed back to look for Jim and Colin. He got back to Middleton-on-the-Wolds with no sign of the twosome before abandoning his “search”. Unfortunately for him the two “computer hunters” had gone back into Etton in their forlorn search for the missing device then taken a completely different route to the cafe.

Meanwhile the main group headed from Bainton to Hutton Cranswick and the farm shop cafe where we were due to meet up with Mel and Val. Sitting around the table Neil began to wonder where Mel was. “You told him 1145 it’s now only 1130”. It was not long before Michael arrived followed by Colin and Jim dripping in sweat to regale us with tales of the search.

After the cafe stop some of the group took a longer route home via Huggate while the rest followed our usual route home. Soon after leaving the cafe, Pugwash began to realise there was something wrong with his cleats. As we headed down to Bracken farm, Puggy was unable to release the left side cleat and had to resort to the unfamiliar right side. Arriving at Cherry Burton he took the opportunity to get some help to release the offending attachment. Turns out that two of the three holding screws had fallen out. “No problem” suggested someone “Just take one screw from the right side”. Well it was a great idea, until we found there was also one screw missing from the right as well. “Now what do we do?” In the end Puggy decided to try and ride home with no cleat on the left. After slipping off the pedal a number of times climbing “Grannies Hump”, off came the shoe finishing the ride with just a sock on one side.

Here endeth another memorable ride with the Beverley Knights.

Hutton Cranswick Hurdles

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Ladies and gentlemen welcome to this months running of the Hutton Cranswick Hurdles. It was touch and go whether todays meet would go ahead, however the early morning rain fizzled out leaving the course wet but rideable. It’s approaching 10am and the jockeys and their mounts are assembling at the start line by the Light Dragoon in Etton. Hold on, here’s one jockey arriving with his head almost hanging on his mounts head. Looks like Iain. “Well that was ***** hard going” he said in some sort of Anglo Saxon vernacular referring to the head wind he faced on the way to the start.

And they’re off! Raymond makes a quick getaway for an early lead as the riders approach the first hurdle in the climb up to Holme-on-the-Wolds. Luckily the wind is slightly behind and all the riders make it safely over.

Rounding the next turn, the riders were faced with an adverse wind heading along the ‘back straight’ towards the Goodmanham road hurdle where the riders can build up momentum on the slight downhill before trying to maintain the impetus for the short climb that follows. Once all the riders were safely over the obstacle they arrived at the Middleton-on-the-Wolds turn.

It was not long before the riders were confronted by the next few hurdles on the way to North Dalton. Finally, on reaching the ‘top end of the course’, with a following wind there was a bunch sprint along the main road to Bainton. It was here that the ‘chase’ came to a brief halt as the riders (except for Kamikaze Matty) had to wait for a break in the constant stream of traffic before crossing the A164.

The ‘chase’ then continued along the Neswick straight to Southburn leading the riders to Hutton Balk and the final dash to Hutton Cranswick Farm Shop where the riders were ‘fed and watered’ ready for the return leg.

After a short break, it was time to face the head winds on the way home. While the main bunch took the Bracken route, Michael and Colin however decided to take their mounts a different way home through Skerne and Wansford. There was no hiding from the wind as the riders set off along the initial section of Burnbutts lane. Fortunately it was not long before they found some shelter with the hedgerows.

Heading down Bracken lane the ‘chase’ was exposed once again but at least this section was downhill eventually leading along Mere lane before facing the next ‘hurdle’ of South Dalton Ramp. There was then a brief respite as the riders returned to Etton almost freewheeling with the wind on our backs to the penultimate ‘hurdle’ Etton ramp. The riders then all ‘bunched’ together along the Cherry Burton ‘straight’ girding their loins ready for the final challenge. You could almost hear the strains of Frank Sinatra 🎶and now the end is near, it’s time to face the final hurdle 🎶 😁 Yes it’s everyone’s favourite “Grannies Hump” not a difficult climb in the scheme of things but as usual it comes just when the legs are getting tired.

The ‘course’ was rather damp and quite muddy in places but at least the riders stayed dry with the sun trying to poke through the clouds towards the end. Another very enjoyable day out…. though I suppose I’ll have to clean my mount before the next outing.

Noah’s Farm Shop

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The clouds were rolling away and the wind easing down when Noah’s wife bellowed down from her lofty perch “Right you animals! The floods are receding and it’s time to get you back to the farm(shop) . Assemble at the bottom of the gangplank in Etton at 10am sharp and we’ll follow the ‘usual’ route over Bracken”.

And lo, it came to pass, twelve ‘animals’ gathered for the start of the ‘procession’. Just as the ‘anaconda’ slithered in unannounced and trying to make himself inconspicuous, “Wait a minute” cried Noah’s wife “I count thirteen, but I’ve only reserved twelve places at the ‘trough'”. However at that moment the ‘flying fox’ saved a ‘corporal Jones’ moment by declaring he’d not be stopping, so no need to amend the booking.

The ‘animals’ set off two by two with Noah’s wife leading the way while the rest were happy to tail along behind at a leisurely pace. On reaching South Dalton, the great ‘silverback’, beating his pedals like Phil Collins on the drums, sailed on past the turn to Mere Lane until a chorus of shouts brought him back into the fold. “I thought we were going to Holme-on-the-Wolds” he explained sheepishly. With order restored, the ‘animals’ continued east until reaching Bracken lane. “Ooh that’s a cold wind” they all agreed as they turned North to pass Bracken farm.

On reaching the junction of Burnbutts Lane there was an attempted ‘escape’ when the ‘stallion’ made a bolt for it racing down towards Southburn. It seems that the ‘usual‘ route is not the same for everyone. “Where’s he going?” enquired Noah’s wife. While the ‘giraffe’ went chasing after the runaway, the ‘animals’ outlined the alternative route . “Well he can go that way if he wants, we’re going this way” said Noah’s wife indignantly.

Arriving at the Farm(shop) the ‘animals’ were greeted by a ‘smorgasbord’ of goodies of biblical proportions ready for our delectation. While chomping merrily a discussion regarding the return route ensued. “There’s two options” declared Noah as we began to leave the ‘trough’. “Back into the wind to Huggate or round by Watton” he declared before adding “I’m going by Watton”. In the end three ‘animals’ decided to venture further out to Huggate while the rest followed Noah.

It wasn’t long before another ‘escape’ attempt was made. This time it was Noah’s wife who was about to take the turn off to Skerne instead of straight on to Watton. On reaching the main road, the ‘animals’ split into two groups of four for the short dash to the Kilnwick junction. Just as we started to turn left towards Lockington, Noah’s wife commented with a puzzled look “Why are we going left? I thought we were going to Brandesburton for Ray”………Nurse!

After Lockington we returned to Bracken lane to follow our ‘usual’ route home via South Dalton, Etton and Cherry Burton. Back in the ‘ark’, all the animals agreed it had been a very pleasant day out despite the cool northwesterly wind.

Poets Day

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“P Off Early Tomorrow’s Saturday” though I don’t think it has the same significance for most of our “Friday Riders”. Early warning notice came from regular Friday route master Raymond “Sorry can’t make it this week, so someone else will have to lead”.

Iain was first to respond somewhat unsurely, 
only to say he had to be home prematurely. 
Karl was next "in to bat", 
with an eighty mile ride if you fancy that. 
Matty and Jon said that would be a treat, 
but where and when shall we meet. 
Then up spoke Neil with an alternative route, 
with start time and meeting place to boot. 

Etton was the place where our story unfolds, 
starting with a climb up to Holme-on-the-Wolds. 
Turning into the wind was quite the slog, 
with everyone trying to stay tucked in behind Seadog.
Middleton to North Dalton was a bit up and down, 
As we pedalled through from town to town. 
Continuing up to Huggate with the wind in our face,
We still managed to maintain a decent pace. 
 With the wind behind and mostly downhill to Tibthorpe,
We went up another gear making a bid for "Warp".
Kirkburn and Southburn went by in a flash, 
With personal bests we tried to smash.
With minutes to spare we reached our chosen venue, 
And were still able to choose from the breakfast menu. 

 After lunch there was a split in the "peloton",
While some returned by Bracken the others went by Watton.
Rolling through Kilnwick then onwards to Lockington, 
The "breakaway" returned to route on reaching South Dalton.
For the final leg home we reflected on a day without rain,
Vowing soon to do it all over again.

The Long and The Short of It

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🎶You tak’ the long road and I’ll tak’ the short road, and I’ll be in Farmshop afore ye🎶. Fresh back from his exploits at “training camp” and hedging his bets Raymond announced two different route options. One short and one a bit longer to his favourite cafe stop. “We’ll decide who wants to go which way when we get to Skipsea Brough” he suggested. The weather was kind, light winds and a smattering of sunshine not too hot, perfect for cycling. Seems many others had the same thought as we had a good turnout at Market Cross.

Our fifteen strong group set off to wend their way through the town traffic and traffic lights eventually reaching Weel Bridge. From there we cruised alongside the Hull river, where we only encountered the occasional passing car before bringing our gang into Tickton. Crossing the road at Tickton Grange, we were joined by Chad. Continuing along the cycle path to Whitecross roundabout the pace remained a steady 16-17mph. Raymond’s “training camp” must have done him the world of good. 🤔

From the roundabout, the pace picked up a little more 18, 19, 20mph as we raced through “Brands Hatch”. Boy, that’s some serious training Ray’s been having. Once we’d reached the relatively quieter road to Bewholme, the pace eased off a little but still managed to maintain 17 mph through to Dunnington and up to Skipsea Brough. “Right folks, who wants to go via Beeford and who wants to go via Ulrome?” enquired Raymond as we stopped at the junction near Skipsea Brough. The general consensus was that we were all enjoying the ride and the clement weather so we’ll all “tak’ the long road”. “Ulrome it is then”.

Following the road through Skipsea, we joined the main coast road from Hornsea to Lisset. Once again the pace remained brisk with a light following wind. After crossing the main Bridlington road, things calmed down somewhat as we adopted the more normal “Friday sedate” pace to Gransmoor then left to Great Kelk and Foston-on-the-Wolds. The calm didn’t last long though. Once we hit the road to Wansford, the pace picked up again led initially by Mark and Pugwash maintaining a reasonable 20mph until Karl and Martin overtook and upped the pace to 24-25mph. “Right I’ll have some of that” thought pugwash as we both tucked on their wheel. Needless to say that split the group somewhat.

Crossing Wansford Bridge

After the “mad dash” things eased off once more as we cruised into Skerne. Determined to reestablish a semblance of order, Raymond led from the front as we continued at a normal “Friday pace” to Hutton Cranswick for a well earned cafe stop. While walking our bikes round to the outdoor seating area, Matt lost his balance and tried to grab a nearby wooden box to steady himself. Unfortunately the side of the box was not properly secured causing him to crash land on the ground in an ungainly fashion. To add to his embarrassment, his faux-pas was witnessed by two passing young girls who giggled at the spectacle. Luckily, only his pride was injured.

Following our refreshments, it was time to make our way home. Mounting the bikes to restart the ride there was a chorus of groans as tired muscles were forced to resume action. “Ooh, aah, ouch, I’ve siezed up” said someone as we set off towards Bracken. At least the pace home would be a bit more genteel as the efforts of the first 30 miles began to take effect.

Our way home followed our usual route through South Dalton to Etton and Cherry Burton. As we regrouped at the junction in Cherry Burton, the chatter and banter among the group kept us all entertained with nobody willing to begin the final leg home until Matty piped up “Come on, we can chatter while we pedal”. Spurred on by the “call to arms”, Karl made the first move and set off to cross the road accompanied by a warning SHOUT from Matt “CAR LEFT” which sent us all into giggles as we realised that he could also have meant “KARL LEFT”.

Overall it was an excellent ride over a good route with great company and great “craich”. Covering around 50 miles from Beverley and back or little extra for those living in the Eastern “sticks” and a special shout out to Mark who completed a massive century ride by riding in from Driffield and back as well.

Sergeant Pepper’s Cycle Club Band

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“Message from Tracy Island” cried out Sergeant Pepper trying to drum up some company for a sedentary ride to Hutton Cranswick. “Sedentary?” asked one voice “Isn’t that some kind of rock?”. “No, it’s the stuff you find at the bottom of a glass of home brew” ventured another. “Well I prefer Indieous” said another. Speaking of which, after our recent spell of Arctic Monkeys and Cold Play it seems a long time since the last Friday group ride.

“Forgive that little intrusion, where was I? Oh yes, hallelujah it’s not ‘Raining Men’ and forecast looking good so Thunderbirds are Go! Meet at Manor House 0945”. Renditions of “I’ll be there” rang out from many quarters. However there is always one who wants to spoil the party. “We won’t be there, we’re cycling in sunny Tenerife” declared Neil, posting pictures just to add to our jealousy.

And that’s when the confusion started. “I’ll be there” said Pugwash which heralded a tongue in cheek comment “What Tenerife? Good effort Capt”. The musing continued when Stephen suggested his ideal commute would be between skiing in the Alps and Tenerife on the bike. The ‘wag’ then responded with a strava picture of said commute showing 6 days 5 hours by bike. “I’ll be there” added Michael. “Ooh where are you staying Michael? We’re heading up Mt Teide tomorrow” enquired Heather. Must be all that sun going to their heads. 🤔😉

No such luck here, as the dark clouds continued to obscure the sun. Ten Knights eventually turned up at Manor House setting off at a gentle pace towards Cherry Burton and Etton. A great chance to catch up with tales of Christmas and New year adventures. Our route today took us past the duck pond at South Dalton onto the Bracken road to Southburn and looping round to the Cranswick Farm Shop.

For the return journey, Matt and Michael set off ahead of the rest to attend prior appointments. Just as the bunch were getting ready to leave the cafe, we were joined by Steve Guest. Unfortunately for him there was no time for a bacon sarnie or cake. The route home took us back down the Bracken road, retracing our ‘steps’ through South Dalton and Etton.

It was great to be back outside and in wonderful company once more for the first Friday ride of 2023. We look forward to many more.